10 Types of Men You're Better Off Avoiding on Gay Dating Sites

Dating apps promised to change everything. And in a way, they did—now you can find disappointment in just three clicks, without even leaving your home. Grindr, Hornet, Scruff, Romeo: millions of men, endless scrolling, and the same old faces from city to city, country to country. Welcome to the zoo.

1. The Phantom of Distance

The app swears he’s 200 meters away. You can almost smell his cologne. You message him—and it turns out he’s in a neighboring region; he just forgot to update his location three months ago. Or maybe he didn’t forget. Or maybe he lives in a parallel reality where distances work differently. Either way—it’s not meant to be.

2. Anatomy Enthusiast

No “hello.” No name. The first message—a close-up of something you haven’t even thought of yet. A face on the profile picture? Why bother—he’s got something more interesting. The question isn’t whether this is appropriate. The question is whether to respond at all.

3. The Great Silent One

He messaged you first. You were happy. You replied. He read it—and vanished. But look: he’s online. Online again. Online again. What was that—a spur-of-the-moment impulse, a random tap, an existential crisis? An unsolvable mystery. Just add him to the long list of “why bother?”

4. The Eternal Companion

At first, it seems like this is the one. Smart, lively, interesting. You message back and forth for a day, a week, or two. You learn about his favorite movies, his cat, and his relationship with his mom. But as soon as you hint at meeting up—the tone changes abruptly. He’s ready to talk endlessly. But meeting up? Never. This isn’t dating. It’s messaging a ghost with a great sense of humor.

5. The Aggressive Impatient One

You stepped away from your phone for ten minutes. When you came back, there were five messages: “?”, “Are you there?”, “Where’d you go?”, “Okay, got it,” “Oh well.” He’s already gotten upset, managed to make peace with himself, and seems to have gone through all the stages of grief. It’s scary to even imagine meeting someone like that in real life.

6. The Eye-Catcher

His profile is a small photo gallery. His torso, his torso again, a mirror at the gym, a sunset, and his torso once more. He flirts willingly and skillfully. But at some point, he honestly admits: he’s “just hanging out,” “not looking for anything serious.” Nothing serious—no. But he accepts compliments without fail. This isn’t a dating app. For him, it’s a mirror with notifications.

7. A Surprise Couple

In the photo is a man. Handsome, confident, clearly aware of his own worth. You’ve been chatting for a while, everything’s going well—and then it turns out he’s looking for a third person. Along with his partner. Who looks a little different from the profile picture. Looking for adventure as a couple is perfectly normal. But hiding half the equation off-camera—that’s a whole different story.

8. Racist

Sometimes it’s right there in the description: “only [ethnic group],” “sorry, not my thing,” “it’s not racism, just preferences.” That’s racism. The word “preferences” doesn’t make it any less racist. Profiles like this exist, and it’s an unpleasant truth that prejudice hasn’t gone anywhere. — They just created accounts.

9. Narcissus

He’s athletic, photogenic, and clearly spends a lot of time at the gym. And he clearly thinks you have to pass an audition just to have the right to write to him. He responds coolly, sizes you up quickly, and says goodbye even faster. Maybe there’s a normal person hiding beneath that shell. But getting there is a quest in itself, and it’s not a given that it’s worth the effort.

10. The Enemy of Rubber Bands

Everything was going well. You’re attracted to each other, you’ve agreed to meet, you’re discussing the details—and then he says he “doesn’t like condoms.” Period. This isn’t a matter of taste, nor is it up for debate. It’s a matter of health—yours and his. And if he’s not willing to talk about it seriously, it’s better to cancel the date.