Men are like pizza. There are a million of them, but we usually like only a couple of them. We divided them into the most popular "types", and this is what we got.
PIZZA FROM THE SCHOOL CANTEEN
The same eleventh grader you were crazy about in the eighth grade. In your memories, it's a bangy boy on a skateboard, but in reality it's a balding uncle on a "chetyrka" with alimony. It's fun to remember until you try other pizzas from normal restaurants. This is a guy who tastes good only in the context of youthful nostalgia.
FROZEN PIZZA
The one who has always been "in reserve". A semi-finished product that lay in the freezer and quietly watched you try others. It doesn't really develop itself, but if chance inexorably leads you to 30, and there is nothing else in the freezer, this option will do. And it seems that the shelf life is infinite, but you definitely don't want to eat it.
PEPPERONI PIZZA
The main alpha. Sausage to the maximum! I'm sure you've never tasted better. He is so caring: if you write to him that you are sick, he will answer: "Don't get sick, otherwise I will swear." It looks hot, but in fact it is excessively greasy and a little hackneyed. A great option for tasting, but living with one all your life is a task for few.
"MARGARITA" PIZZA
An all-time classic. A stable guy who will always write you "Good morning" and shake your hand on the step. So reliable that you can even shit with it with the bathroom doors open. But there is a nuance: if you suddenly want spiciness, you won't wait for it. His recipe is simple: work, home, meeting with friends. That's it! And he doesn't need anything else.
HOMEMADE PIZZA
This guy personifies comfort. With him, you feel warm and calm, as if you are hugging a soft blanket on a cold evening. He is definitely not a fan of parties or noisy parties. Instead, they watch TV shows in bed and fall asleep in an embrace. For many, this is an ideal option, which does not work out the first time, but after it it is already difficult to go to a pizzeria, because everything there seems cold and artificial.
PINEAPPLE PIZZA
A guy you can't really say anything about. As strange and chaotic as possible. Half-IT guy, half-rapper, a bit of a huckster, sometimes pretends to write poetry. People around are gasping: "Are you with him? You're crazy!" but it catches with its atypical taste. But after a couple of "tastings" you don't know whether you want to forget more or better, like a bad dream.
Everyone has their own tastes - both in guys and in pizza. The main thing is that the one you choose goes with you like cheese, dough and filling. And even if someone says that your pizza is strange or unusual, the most important ingredient in the recipe for happiness is your sense of taste.
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